Photo credit: Deborah Cotorceanu

Today is September 1, 2025. Yesterday (the last Sunday of August) was International Bereaved Father’s Day. Father’s grieve too, and sometimes we overlook this… Take a moment to be aware of grieving fathers that you may know.

There is a Psalm that speaks to the direction of grief. Psalm 56, although inspired by David’s encounter being seized by the Philistines in Gath, bears the intensity felt in other life circumstances and then a way forward rather than backward.

In verse 3, David simply claims that when he is afraid, he puts His trust in God. There is direction here. Here is a category of grieving whereby one grieves with hope rather than hopelessness. The journey through grief experienced in infertility, miscarriage, or infant loss is emotionally similar to David’s experience of being seized by the Philistines. The situation seems fearful, futile, and final.

But, God (in verse 8) is heralded by David as the Loving Father Who sees and hears and keeps count of our tossings and collects them in His bottle. Psalm 56:8 says, “You have kept count of my tossings; put my tears in Your bottle. Are they not in Your book?”

David moves in the direction of God with his personal grief. He moves toward the settled assurance of faith. He will trust God and not be afraid. He will remind himself that no one can take his faith away or harm him in an ultimate way. No one can remove the direction of his choice to grieve with hope.

Jesus Himself quoted two Psalms when He was enduring deep affliction, grief, and brokenheartedness: Psalm 22:1 and Psalm 31:5. His direction was not hopelessness and despair, but rather His direction was true grief with true hope. He endured the cross for the “joy set before Him” (Hebrews 12:2), but there He also endured powerlessness and total dependence on the Father. His direction was clear.

We don’t, can’t, and shouldn’t skip grieving. Neither did Jesus. But, we can choose the direction of our grief journey. We can choose to experience pain knowing that Jesus did too. We can choose to place all our tossings in Jesus’s capable hands. We can choose the direction of grief that commends our care to the loving kindness of Jesus. The direction of hope is in Him.

Psalm 63:8 says, “My soul clings to You; Your right hand upholds me.”